When life changes and a difficult time begins then it’s not always easy to remain positive.

I know.

Even if you’re pretty optimistic and positive in daily life, it’s easy to get dragged down into pessimism and a sad funk when you’re having a rough week or tough month.

But being able to keep a positive mindset can make a big difference.

So in today’s post I’d like to share the best tips and habits that have helped me over the past 10+ years and still helps me today to handle times like that in a better, healthier and more helpful way.

I truly hope you’ll find something helpful here.

1. Feel what you feel and know it’s OK to do so.

I’ve found that one thing that helps me with my mental health when times get tough is to not deny or push away how I feel.

When a negative situation has just happened and I’m in the middle of it then I at first may feel afraid, nervous, worried or angry. Or a mix of those emotions. That’s normal.

Acknowledging negative thoughts and feelings that can arise from such a situation helps me to process what has happened in a quicker and less painful way compared to if I try to reject such thoughts and emotions.

And it also helps me to, after a while, move on to the next stage of trying to solve or at least improve upon the situation at hand.

So, first know it’s OK to feel and think what you feel. But don’t get stuck in focusing and mulling that over for days or weeks.

2. Ask helpful questions.

A simple next step to move forward is to ask yourself better questions than you may sometimes do in these situations (I, at least, certainly used to ask myself questions all the time that only made me feel worse).

This will help you to regain a positive outlook and find a positive interpretation of the events.

Some of my favorite questions are for example:

• What is one thing that is positive or good about this situation?
• What is one opportunity within this situation?
• Will this matter 5 years from now? Or even 5 months from now?
• What is one small action, one small and practical step I can take to start turning this situation around?

Ask yourself one or a few of these questions to move yourself into a more optimistic and energetic state of mind and to start making a small plan for what you can do to improve the situation you’re in.

3. Talk it over with someone close to you.

This is one of the most powerful tips in this post and one my most used ones.

Just letting your thoughts and feelings out can be a powerful thing. It can relieve stress and anxiety and all the inner pressure that has built up inside.

And it can help you find a new perspective.

Sometimes as someone close to you simply listens and as you vent and figure things out for yourself.

And sometimes as the other person helps you to navigate your situation and out of negative thinking by sharing what they did when they had similar troubles or by building a small plan together with you for what you need to do next.

4. Get some good knowledge.

You can dispel vague fear and the clouds of uncertainty and anxiety in your mind by doing a bit of research.

By talking to people who have been where you are – or reading their books or listening to their podcasts – you can start to build a realistic roadmap of what your best course of action is and what you can expect on your journey.

This clarity may sometimes bring you new, possible obstacles on your path forward that you had not thought about. But I’ve found that it is a small price to pay. And knowing about them makes it a lot easier to overcome them or reduce their impact compared to if you are just stumbling around in the dark.

5. Tap into gratitude for a few minutes.

Yes, times may be tough right now. It’s not fun.

But there are usually things one can still be grateful for. And tapping into such gratitude tends to be a great way to change your perspective and to improve your energy levels and mood.

A few of the things I tend to feel thankful for even when times are hard are:

• Three meals a day.
• A roof over my head during the windy and rainy fall and the cold winter days.
• Plenty of clean water.

You can find more of these things in this post: 10 Simple Things You Can Be Grateful for Even When Times are Tough.

6. Spend less time on your phone and negative sources.

Keeping yourself updated on what’s happening in your community and the world is helpful.

But spending too much time doomscrolling online or – in my experience at least – on your phone in general tends to lead to more stress, anxiety and negative feelings and thoughts bouncing around in your head.

So spend a bit of time – but not too much – on the news (and especially the negative news stories). And limit your screen time, especially on your phone.

I’ve found that doing this makes me feel better and more optimistic. Especially when I am already going through some tough days, weeks or months. Or during times when it just seems hard to stay positive in a negative world.

7. Readjust your environment to be more supportive and positive.

So spending less time on negative sources of information helps. Spending more of the time you have now freed up from that on positive and supportive sources helps even more.

Find books, Youtube channels, podcasts and so on that uplifts you, helps you to feel better and give you ideas for how to handle challenges in your life.

Then, take the next step to reshape your daily and monthly environment to be a more positive space. Take a look at the people in your life and how they affect you.

Because the people we spend the most time with tend to have a pretty big effect on how we feel and think about things and how resilient we are during hardships.

You can for example ask yourself:

• Who are the 3 most negative people I spend time with?
• Who are the 3 most positive and supportive people I spend time with?

Then take a bit of time to figure out how to spend less time with those most negative people and more of the time you free up from that with the most positive people.

8. Spend more time outside and in nature.

I find that if I just go out and cut some grass or do some garden work I tend to feel better and refreshed.

And the same goes for taking a walk in the woods, by the ocean or anywhere out in nature in some form.

It makes it easier to think clearly and optimistically again and the fresh air and exercise recharges my energy.

9. Help someone out.

Perhaps a bit counter-intuitive if you’re not feeling so good about your own life.

But helping someone out when you yourself are going through a tough time can in my experience help a lot.

I’ve found that it gets me out of my head and away from getting stuck in mulling the same negative thoughts over and over.

And if the situation I am going through makes me feel powerless or like a victim then helping someone else out makes me feel strong and capable again.

Plus, their happiness from being helped flows over to me too. And if you help someone then they will often return that favor in some way sooner or later.

A few simple ways to help someone out are to:

• Give them a hand practically with something.
• Give them some good advice based on your experience.
• Just listen when they vent or need to let something out.
• Give them a genuine compliment for something that means a lot to them or something they do that is too often taken for granted.

10. Spend more time in the present moment.

Learn what you can from the past. And plan for the future by, for example, writing out a plan for the week during Monday morning and then by doing a short to-do list or plan each morning for your day.

But after you’ve done that, don’t linger too much in the past or future because it can bring much fear, worries and negative feelings if you are already in a difficult situation.

Instead, try to spend only 20% or so in the past or future and the rest in the present moment.

I’ve found that when I spend most of my time in the present moment then it’s a lot easier to keep up the motivation, the energy and to access positive emotions.

And to stay practical about what I can do about a negative situation in my life and actually take steps forward with that.

A simple way to reconnect with the present moment if you are slipping into the past or future and getting stuck there is to focus just on what’s going on around you right now for a minute or two.

Feel it with all your senses. See it in detail…

• Hear the birds or cars going by outside your window.
• Smell the cold autumn air of the coffee brewing in the next room.
• Feel the sun, rain or wind on your skin.

You can find a few more ways to spend more time in the present moment in your daily life in this post.

11. Focus on physical fundamentals.

When you’re in a tough situation then it’s easy to stop paying much attention to the fundamental building blocks of daily life.

You feel you simply don’t have time for that and you forget about it. But it’s at these times when the fundamentals can be more important than ever for how you think, feel and act.

The fundamentals I’m referring to are basics such as eating well, exercising and getting enough quality sleep.

These simple things – often ignored because they seem a bit boring or basic – make staying positive easier.

So as best you can, even though your situation may be difficult, try to eat healthy meals, to get some exercise in (even just regular walks) and to not skip on sleep (you can find my guide to sleeping better here).

12. Prepare if you think you’ll receive potentially negative news.

It could be some news at work, with your health or finances or perhaps with family or a pet.

No matter what the potential upcoming situation might be, I have many times found it very helpful to make a small plan or know just one or a few steps I can take if that situation becomes reality.

For example:

• Actions you can take to reduce the severity of the issue you may be facing.
• Looking up what others have done in such situations.
• Preparing your surroundings and home so they are comfortable and filled with things you enjoy and people you love.

Sometimes I don’t need this plan because those potential negative news don’t become reality. Or they are simply so much smaller than I feared that they aren’t that much to deal with at all.

But I still find that the plan helps me because when I’ve written it down I tend to release most of my worrying and negative thoughts about that situation. And so I now feel better and can focus my thoughts and energy again on other things I want to do and enjoy.

13. Remind yourself: I have handled tough situations in the past.

No matter if you just landed in a negative situation, if you’ve been there for a while or fear you may soon wind up in such a situation it’s easy to lose your faith in yourself.

To forget that you have handled tough situations before.

But you have. Many times.

So remind yourself of this simple fact to make it easier to stay optimistic. And to breathe, to calm down and to figure out what you’ve learned from situations in the past that can help you this time too.

14. Seek professional help.

If you use one or a few of these tips for a bit of time and still don’t get the result and inner change you want then consider getting professional one-on-one help.

Getting that on-going support and help in person from an expert like a mental health professional can make a big difference.

Want to more information and motivation to help you stay positive? Then check out this post with 19 tips on how to stay positive and this one on how to stay positive at work.

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When you get disappointed then it can hurt. Sometimes a bit. Sometimes a lot.

It can drag you down into a negative funk for days or even weeks.

But if you learn how to deal with that disappointment in a healthier and more helpful way then it can be less a lot less scary and painful and actually a springboard or learning experience for further personal growth.

That’s at least been my experience in the past decade.

And in this post I’d like to share 12 steps, tips and habits that I’ve learned over the years and that help me to both handle disappointment and to reduce the situations where I get disappointed in the first place.

1. First, accept how you feel.

Disappointment hurts. And that’s OK.

Don’t try to push it away. And don’t try to hide it under a big smile.

I’ve found that it works better to not be swept away by such tempting impulses.

But to instead accept how I feel. To let it all in and to hurt for a while.

Because if I do then it will go quicker and in the long run be less painful to process what has happened.

If I on the other hand reject how I honestly feel then those emotions can pop up later and at unexpected times. And make me moody, pessimistic or passive aggressive.

2. Remember, you are not a disappointment.

Just because you may have been disappointed, had a setback or made a mistake and disappointed someone else doesn’t mean that you are a disappointment or failure.

And this situation that you’re in right now won’t last forever. Even if it might feel that way today.

The truth is:

• Just because you were disappointed today or you disappointed someone doesn’t mean that you’ll be or do that tomorrow or the next time.
• This does not label you as a disappointment (unless you choose to put that label on yourself).
• If you keep moving forward and you keep taking action then you’ll move on and you’ll improve.

3. Learn from it.

Instead of getting lost in the pain and negative emotions that can come from a disappointment choose to see it more as something you can learn valuable things from (and something that’ll help you to grow).

You can do that by asking yourself better questions.

Questions like:

• What is one thing I can learn from this?
• How can I adjust my course to avoid this disappointment in the future?
• What is one thing I can do differently the next time?

Maybe you learn that you can likely communicate better the next time when you’re in a similar situation or working together with someone else on a task or project.

Or that you need to give yourself a better balance between rest and work to avoid mistakes or to think more clearly.

You might even realize that you need to make a bigger change in your life and start spending less time – or no time at all – with someone who has disappointed you too many times (or always makes you feel like a disappointment no matter how hard you try).

4. Remind yourself: disappointment will happen if you go outside of your comfort zone.

Who is never disappointed? Or never feeling low about a setback or a mistake?

The people who never really go outside of their comfort zone.

Everyone who is now successful and you may look up to have had his or her share of disappointments and failures.

Setbacks and sometimes feeling disappointed is a natural part of living your life fully. A sign of you trying to grow and improve your situation.

I’ve found that just keeping this fact in mind helps me to stay strong and to more easily handle my own stumbles and setbacks.

5. Refocus on what you still got in your life.

To move on shift your focus to what you still got in your life.

The people, the passions and the things you sometimes may take for granted like a roof over your head and clean water.

Tapping into gratitude in this way helps me to put things into perspective and to not let a disappointment overwhelm me and derail my whole week.

6. Talk it over with someone close to you.

Getting a healthier and wider perspective on what happened is, as already mentioned, a vital part of dealing with disappointment in a better way.

And one of the most powerful ways to do that is in my experience to let it out into the light and to talk it over with someone close to you.

By venting as your friend just listens you can release that inner pressure, sort things out for yourself and accept what has happened instead of trying to push it away or ignoring it.

And if the two of you have a conversation about it then you can see the situation through someone else’s eyes and from another perspective.

This person can help you to ground yourself and to not make a mountain out of a molehill. And the two of you can together come up with the start of an action-plan for how you will move forward.

7. If your expectations are of perfection, then adjust them.

If you demand or expect perfection from yourself or from other people then you’ll often be disappointed.

So adjust your expectations a bit.

If you’re disappointed in what you did, what someone else did or how a situation turned out in your life ask yourself:

Will this matter in 5 years? Or even 5 weeks?

That’s one thing that has helped me greatly to not make mountains out of molehills and to adjust my own expectations.

Another helpful thing is simply to remind yourself that if you buy into myths of perfection then you will hurt yourself and the people in your life.

Because such myths that you may have picked up from movies, songs and simply what the world or Instagram highlight reels are telling you will clash with reality and tends to:

• Cause much stress and suffering within you and in the people around you.
• Get you stuck in procrastination because you become fearful of being disappointed or disappointing someone else once again.
• Harm or possibly lead you to end relationships, jobs, projects etc. because your expectations are out of this world.

Keeping this reminder at the forefront of my mind – and sometimes written down on a piece of paper – has definitely helped me to adjust my expectations and reduce my own suffering and disappointments.

8. Take a break (and find other ways to reduce your stress levels as you move forward).

Just focusing on your goals and working towards them all the time can cause unnecessary stress and make you lose your perspective.

And sometimes you just need a break to get over a disappointment. So take some time to rest up, recharge and to have some fun.

After you’ve taken that time off from your goals and dreams you’ll likely be in a better place to accept and learn from what happened and to then move forward once again.

When you’re in this more level-headed place then also take a bit of time to see how you can plan for a better balance between work and restful downtime.

I’ve found that when my balance between those two things is in order then it is usually quite a bit easier to handle setbacks and things not going as I’d like in a more constructive and mentally centered way.

9. Get outside of your own head.

If you know you have a tendency to get stuck in mulling over a negative situation for too long and going down into a downward spiral then get out of your own head and thoughts bouncing around in there.

Two ways to do that and to focus your attention outward is to:

• Help someone out. Help a friend plan for a party or a meeting at work. Or help him with moving boxes and other stuff into his new home. Or simply be fully there and listen to her as she vents about a disappointment in her life.
• Exercise. I find that lifting weights or going out for a long walk is a great way for me to focus outward once again, to renew my energy and to sharpen my focus.

10. Find energy and motivation again with the help of others.

Lift your spirits, up the motivation and your positive thinking with the help of others.

It could be with the help of conversations with friends, family or co-workers.

But also help from other people further away in the world (and sometimes in time). Renew that focus and motivation to keep moving towards your dreams with the help of for example:

• Books (motivational ones or perhaps biographies of people you look up to) and podcasts.
• Movies, TV-shows and Youtube-channels.
• Online forums and social media channels.

Spend anywhere from 10-60 minutes with one or a few such sources to find new energy and a shift in your thinking.

11. Find a small step to start moving forward again.

After you have accepted the situation, perhaps learned a thing or two from it and upped your motivation again start to move forward.

You don’t have to take a big and bold leap though.

When I’m in this place myself I usually try to come up with at least the start for a small action-plan for how to go forward. I do that together with someone – like for example my wife – or on my own.

Then I break that plan down into small action-steps. And get to work with the first of those steps.

If I start procrastinating on that step then I break it down into even smaller steps and take action on one of those.

12. Improve your self-esteem.

Improving my self-esteem has helped me to avoid getting dragged down too far into self-criticism and negative emotions after a disappointment.

It has also helped me to not get disappointed in myself as often as I used to but to handle a setback with a more level-headed mind and more emotional stability.

This also makes it easier to not blame others to feel better about myself and to learn more from this situation and get better results the next time.

So how do you improve your self-esteem?

A couple of the most helpful tips and habits I’ve found are:

Write down 3 things in the evening that you appreciate about yourself.

Take a couple of minutes at the end of your day to ask yourself: What are 3 things I can appreciate about myself? 

Write down your answers in a notebook, on your laptop or a smart phone. This will help you to start focusing on the positive things about yourself and to stop being so self-critical.

Stop falling into the destructive comparison trap.

If you compare what you have, what you’ve done and who you are to other people and their lives then you’ll most often start to feel depressed and bad about yourself.

Because there’s always people ahead of you.

So choose another way of comparing instead. Start comparing yourself to yourself. See how far you’ve come. What you’ve overcome. And focus on how you’ve improved your results.

Those are just two helpful habits for improving your self-esteem.

You can also use much of what you find in this article such as being constructive in the face of adversity, being kinder and more helpful to others, not thinking that YOU are a disappointment just because of one setback and replacing perfectionism with something healthier.

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The human digestive system is home to trillions of microbial cells that influence human physiology. The micro-organisms in your gut play an important role in maintaining the good health of your body.

They help digest your food, produce vitamins, regulate your immune system, and protect you from harmful pathogens. Scientists have even suggested that gut health may be directly linked to mental health.

Any imbalance in the flora can lead to problems like bloating, gas, constipation, diarrhea, inflammation, and even mood disorders.

Maintaining good gut health is the easiest way to maintain good overall health. You’ll find out 13 easy tips to follow for a healthier and happier gut.

15 Helpful Tips For A Healthier Gut

Here are some of the most helpful tips for a healthier gut:

1. Eat more fiber

To keep your gut healthy, eating more fiber is important. Fiber is like food for the good bacteria in your gut. Foods like fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts, seeds, and beans are rich in fiber.

When you eat fiber, it helps your gut bacteria make helpful substances that reduce inflammation and make your metabolism better. Fiber also adds bulk to your poop, which helps prevent constipation. Doctors suggest aiming for at least 25 grams of fiber every day.

2. Avoid antibiotics

Antibiotics are lifesaving drugs that kill harmful bacteria. But sometimes, antibiotics can also kill the good bacteria in the gut and make you more susceptible to infections, allergies, and stomach pain.

Only take antibiotics when your doctor prescribes, and always finish the course as instructed. Improper use of antibiotics can also result in increased antibiotic resistance.

3. Take prebiotics

You can think of prebiotics as the food for the healthy microflora in your gut. They are probably the easiest way to have a healthy gut.

Most prebiotics are easily tolerated and don’t have any harmful side effects. Prebiotic supplements like FiberMend are easily available on the internet and can easily be mixed with juices or smoothies, or even water for a healthy, nutritious drink anytime during the day.

Prebiotics can help with digestive issues like irritable bowel syndrome, diarrhea, and ulcerative colitis. They can also boost your immunity and mood.

4. Take probiotics

Not to be confused with prebiotics, probiotics are actual live bacteria that can replenish your gut flora and restore its diversity and function.

You can find probiotics in foods like yogurt, kefir, sauerkraut, kimchi, kombucha, and tempeh, or take them as supplements.

Probiotics are useful, especially after a course of antibiotics that kills good and bad gut bacteria.

5. Eat fermented foods

These are foods that have been transformed by beneficial bacteria through a process called fermentation.

Foods that are fermented contain probiotics as well as prebiotics with a healthy dosing of enzymes, vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants.

Some examples of fermented foods are yogurt, kefir, sauerkraut, kimchi, kombucha, tempeh, miso, natto, and sourdough bread.

6. Limit sugar and processed foods

These are the perfect comfort food for everyone, including, unfortunately, the bad gut bacteria itself.

Sugary and processed foods usually don’t have enough fiber and nutrients that are good for your gut.

The harm starts from the mouth, with sugar causing plaque and cavities. Eating too much sugar and processed foods can also make you gain weight, get diabetes, and develop heart problems.

7. Drink plenty of water

Water is essential for your gut health because it helps flush out toxins and waste products from your body.

It also hydrates the mucous membranes that line your digestive tract and protect you from infections.

Water also keeps your stool soft and easy to pass, preventing constipation and hemorrhoids.

Aim for at least eight glasses of water every day or more if you exercise or live in a hot climate.

8. Get enough sleep

Getting enough sleep can help your whole body, not just your gut. Sleep deprivation has been linked to gut problems.

One reason can be that the body takes 12 hours to digest a healthy meal. If you are always awake and working, the body may not get the time to digest food properly.

9. Manage stress

Stress can hurt your gut health by altering your gut bacteria composition and function. It can also affect digestion by causing spasms, cramps, nausea, diarrhea, or constipation.

Stress can also weaken your immune system, making you more prone to infections and inflammation.

Try to practice relaxation techniques like meditation, yoga, and breathing exercises to manage stress.

10. Exercise

Even moderate amounts of exercise have been linked to good gut health. No need to hit the gym. Even half an hour of walking outside in the lovely sun can help boost your gut and give you that extra vitamin D.

If you have a hectic schedule and can’t make the time, small habits can help make a positive change.

Taking the stairs instead of the elevator, walking to get something instead of asking someone else to get it for you, and even taking the longer route to walk somewhere can increase your daily movement.

11. Stop smoking

Smoking doesn’t just harm the lungs, but it can also harm the gut. Smoking can affect the gut microflora and change its composition by increasing the bad bacteria and decreasing the good ones.

It can also disrupt the internal protective lining of the gut and the acid-base balance in the gut. 

12. Chew your food properly 

This may sound simple, but properly chewing food and breaking it into smaller and smaller pieces will make it easier for the gut bacteria to digest the food.

When food takes long to digest, it can lead to gas, bloating, and sometimes even constipation.

13. See your doctor often 

If you are facing gut issues that are worsening or not improving, it would be worthwhile to get a general physician to look at what’s wrong. Proper medical care in time is the best gift you can give your body.

14. Eat out less

Restaurant food often has hidden stuff that’s bad for your gut – like extra salt, sugar, and artificial ingredients. When you cook at home, you control what goes in your food.

Try to eat out just once a week. This simple change helps your gut bacteria stay healthy and reduces stomach problems.

Home cooking is usually fresher and cleaner, which your digestive system loves.

15. Mix up your diet

Think of your gut bacteria as a garden. Different plants need different foods to grow. When you eat lots of different foods, you feed many types of good bacteria.

Try adding one new veggie or fruit each week. Swap your usual grain for something different. Your gut works best when it gets many different plant foods – beans, nuts, seeds, fruits, and vegetables of different colors.

This variety helps build a stronger gut that fights off sickness better and helps your whole body feel good.

Conclusion

If you really want to enjoy what you eat and drink, you better take care of your gut health and ensure things are moving smoothly. Acidity and pain can ruin your day. We hope these tips will help you understand how to take care of your gut. Happy eating and healthy living!

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